kind of a poem, kind of not

things are not always right

a lot the worst person ends up on the top 

and we all fall off the deep end

and try to live but don't know how

it's good

because hard things make better people

and suffering allows for greater joy

from smaller things.

and we find humility

and realize that we are really not that important

but just part of a field of grass

and it all blows grows and lives and dies.

we weren't created for here

and the joy is but fleeting.

we can find though in hope and love

and the love is all that matters

we ask God for things we know will hurt a lot

and we live in ways without counting the cost

but the days just keep coming

and the shepherd is always watching over the flock

i think i don't know anything

but that the wisdom of the world is complete shit

but we know how to hope and we know how to pray

so we should be fine for today

Taking it Easy

Whenever I think about life too much I always come back to the same general conclusions.  I think my highest quality of life is a simple one, and I think that living comfortably is not really living at all.

"There is nothing better for a person than that he should eat and drink and find enjoyment in his toil."

Ecclesiastes 2:12

In Ecclesiastes the writer says much knowledge is much vexation, but in Philippians, Paul writes that wisdom increases love. At first I was confused, but now I love this idea.  I think it means that seeking power and knowledge from the world will only make us more miserable, but that trusting and accepting the lessons from God will allow us to discern Truth and love what is worth loving.

Simple joys from the week:

picking up some farm raised eggs and veggies from ZJ farms in Solon, IA.

Drinking some fresh squeezed carrot apple ginger juice from Wake Up Iowa City. 

Getting excited about all types of summer shindigs:

-Opportunities to race in New York and Austin!

-Planning a minimalist 2 week camping road trip to the WEST

-Making homemade nutella, homemade dish soap, homemade everything

-reading lots of cs lewis and the good word

-preparing for a 2 week trip to China

-spending my last couple months with the best friends I have ever had!

 "I can do all things through Him who strengthens me."

Philippians 4:13

And as long as we are delighting in the Lord, we should do whatever we want! Because that is also what He wants.

Amen to that!

Home

Sometimes when I go home I get all excited to go to Trader Joe's or the Art Center or East Village. 

But this time I just went home for the people.

And when you don't feel anxious about always getting somewhere, its nice to just enjoy small things.

making a summer fire with best friends from home and laughing about old memories

Going on walks and getting to see beautiful flowers planted by THIS GIRL

Going for a run through endless dirt trails and finishing with a nice swing session

And of course hula hooping and frolicking around with these two

And so this trip home was a new type of home! And I liked it! And it can happen anywhere wherever you are because it's not the things but the people and experiences that really matter 

Although I can't say I minded getting a brand new car

;)

Madison

It wasn't until my third trip to Madison that I actually SAW Madison.  It was the most amazing place, and I thrived on the opportunity to make a track meet into a vacation.

My favorite things:

The local gem, Michelangelo's coffee that was recommended by the hotel shuttle driver.

The hotel shuttle driver: What an inspiring man! He was a musician from Madison that drove the shuttle around to earn enough money to follow his dreams.  He travels around the world to play music and just do what he really loves.  I want to be like him.

Downtown Madison. a wonderful time!

The jean studded shorts I splurged on at Urban Outfitters. They may be worn every day of summer.

And the track meet was lots of fun too! And great to finally feel like myself again. being patient was just turning into being depressed! This is what the sky looked like before the 10k.

I would be really okay with going back there.

No Fear

Since I have now officially graduate college and still have no idea what I am doing or where I am going, I have found myself anxiously trying to grasp for something certain or force something that feels unnatural. I know that this is because I am a human, but being anxious is not a good thing.

Jesus said, "Have no anxiety about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be known to God. And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus."

I think this is really a beautiful thing.  I always laugh at how simple things are and how I can find about forty million other things to do some days before just simply going to God.  I have often found myself spinning around in circles and running away from Him in order to pursue my own passions, but recently I have a discovered a really beautiful truth.  God has put certain passions within us as a gift and He asks us not to neglect them.  What we truly desire is also what God desires, and when we are closest to Him we can know this.

This is such good news! There is nothing for me to be afraid of! Even if I have to wander around aimlessly for some time, I feel confident and certain that God has a plan and, sometimes it is only through suffering that the plan is most wonderfully accomplished!

i love iowa city.

it's been really good to me. And saying bye will be hard.

Normally I am the kind of person that never wins anything, but lately I have been much more lucky! Now that I have said this my luck will probably be gone forever, but it's been good while it's lasted!

Finding my first ever four leaf clover was such an excitement!

Then Yda found one only minutes later.

Earlier this year I won a gift card to this restaurant: Chef's Table I would never have been able to afford anything on the menu, so guiltless dining with Megs was awesome.

Earlier this week, I won a drawing at a local coffee shop! My prize was a drawing of a dragon. Similar to the ones below : Pretty cool.

I also went to Brueggers several weeks ago and they gave me twelve bagels for free since the day was ending! Maybe I just notice all these good things because I feel I am unlucky, but it's so exciting when unexpected goodness occurs!

"And this is His command: to believe in the name of his son, Jesus Christ, and to love one another as he commanded us." - 1 John 3:23

"Owe no one anything, except to love each other, for the one who has loved has fulfilled the law." Romans 13:8

“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you,  so that you may be sons of your Father who is in heaven. For he makes his sun rise on the evil and on the good, and sends rain on the just and on the unjust.  For if you love those who love you, what reward do you have? Do not even the tax collectors do the same?
Matthew 5:43-48

"Teacher what is the greatest commandment in the Law? Jesus replied, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart, and with all your soul, and with all your mind. This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: 'Love your neighbor as yourself."

Matthew 22:36-39

HAHA.

It's so simple. To love and to believe. We make all these rules about how to be perfect and better, but often only make ourselves more self-righteous and harder to love because we are imperfect and certainly not better. Just love. love love love love. When I remember this I feel so joyful! Jesus surrounded himself with tax collectors and prostitutes and loved them without judging. 

Though it's simple to understand, love is not easy.  Loving people that are hard to love is really hard and I think that is why we sometimes try to find or create so many other ways to Christ and avoid just pouring ourselves fully into love. But it is the most important thing. 

The People are GOOD. Love them.

I think that the people are good everywhere. Love them.

They are all different and some even too different to get along, but there is good in each one, and each one deserves love. I don't believe that love is infatuation, but that it is a difficult thing. To love people you must be vulnerable and put yourself aside, but you find great unsurmountable joy from unselfishness.  When I am shown this type of love I am always amazed and I hope that I may be it for even just one person each day.

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other.

Intense love does not measure, it just gives.

"Love is unselfishly choosing for another's highest good"

"Love is not affectionate feeling, but a steady wish for the loved person's ultimate good as far as it can be obtained"

Being unwanted, unloved, uncared for, forgotten by everybody, I think that is a much greater hunger, a much greater poverty than the person who has nothing to eat.

Each one of them is Jesus in disguise.

I sometimes get obsessed with things. There are a lot of them right now.

Elbow heart tattoos.

My new iphone case that looks like this:

Your Song by Ellie Goulding- WOW. Thanks Megz.

This quote:

And this show:  The New Girl

:)

It's May! But so many good things happened the last week of April!

Running in the rainy April showers made me feel like I wasn't numb anymore and could be alive again in the muddy puddles and crisp air!

Driving thirty miles to a farm to pick up all our vegetables for the CSA (community supported agriculture) made it so I couldn't resist rolling down the windows and listening to country music. Not to mention gasping with excitement at the rhubarb, kale, bok choy, romaine, herbs, and green onions that last all week! 

As I was walking downtown, Iowa City was bursting with new artistic additions from bicycle artwork to painted benches everywhere!

And last but NOT least. I went to an ADOLEO concert and it rocked a lot! Romans 5:20 "but where sin increased, grace abounded all the more." So much joy!