I realized something today. I am happiest when I'm really not that cool. I love to wear sweatpants that cinch at the bottom or old hats from my dad or really fuzzy socks or converse with holes in them. I really like to eat squash and beets and hot sauce and most people hate them. I think that I was created to just be a huge weirdo. Sometimes I try to be way to too cool by being stylish or impressing people or trying to fit some certain mode. I'm not a super runner and I don't have cool running clothes. I'm not really special in any way at all, and when I remember that then I am happy! God made me only to be nothing and to serve and when I serve other gods or idols or anything other than Him, then my life is not worth all the much. I laugh at the things I do sometimes that I think will make me happy: like moving my legs faster, appearing to be ultra in control of my life and future, wealth, etc. But really I have everything I already need! And the LESS I HAVE, the greater life is. And when I really realize I can't do anything on my own and have absolutely no control over my life, then I can so much appreciate other people and love them and be so amazed by and thankful for them instead of jealous. God is so great! Craziness....
o my rambles.
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